


My Love is Yours

by DesiredPerfection



Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Abusive Relationship, Angst, Character Death, Emotional Hurt, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Falling In Love, Hurt/Comfort, Implied Sexual Content, Love Confessions, M/M, Past Relationship(s), Peaceful Revolution, Physical Abuse, Recollection of memories, Redemption Gavin Reed, Relationship Abuse, Unhealthy Relationships, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-01
Updated: 2019-09-01
Packaged: 2020-10-04 11:09:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,654
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20470031
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DesiredPerfection/pseuds/DesiredPerfection
Summary: Gavin has kept his distance, watching time and time again as Connor is hurt from his relationships. He regrets treating Connor the way he did but his apology goes unaccepted by the android, who only seems to despise Gavin for the humiliation the detective has put him through.A recollection of Gavin's memories and affections towards Connor which ranges for quite some time.





	My Love is Yours

**Author's Note:**

> This is one of my roleplay ideas that I decided to just write out as a story. I'm getting back into writing by using my roleplay prompts since they're quite fun to write about. This is definitely different from normal stories as it's told through Gavin's memories about certain moments.
> 
> Please make sure to read the additional tags!  
Trigger warnings:  
\- Physical abuse is heavily implied in one of Connor's relationships  
\- Major character death

When Gavin had first met Connor, he was absolutely stunned from how drop-dead gorgeous the android’s appearance was. From soft brown hair to warm brown eyes, a sharp jawline and he had the most precious smiles. Connor was made to be visually appealing and to have a friendly vibe around him, which Cyberlife had done a fantastic job with creating him.

Surprise quickly turned into malice, trying whenever he could to belittle Connor when they had first met.

He remembers vividly pulling his service pistol out on Connor, the soft brown eyes boring down into his own.

As if Connor was challenging him.

He remembers lowering his gun, after being threatened by Hank and cursing under his breath before storming out of the interrogation room.

Then there was the day after the interrogation had occurred, Gavin had been casually talking about the awful mischief that his cats had been up to with Tina who listened, adding a few comments here and there.

After explaining his cat’s story, Connor had walked right into the breakroom and Gavin’s attention immediately shifted onto him, directing his co-worker’s attention onto the android as well.

He remembers gesturing towards Connor and exclaiming loudly, “Fuck, look at that... Our friend the plastic detective is back in town! Congratulations on last night, very impressive!”

He recalls clapping his hands before making his way over to Connor, asking what his model that the android was when it was imprinted right on his shirt.

The detective had expected some sort of sarcastic reply, or a simple “look at my jacket.”

Instead, he had received a very direct reply which had answered his question.

He doesn’t remember much about what had exactly been said between the two of them, except that he demanded that Connor bring him a cup of coffee.

Connor had rejected his command, speaking in his monotone voice that he only obeys Lieutenant Anderson which Gavin found quite ridiculous.

He remembers the fury coursing through his veins as he swung his fist straight at Connor’s stomach, the android immediately dropping to the ground and the adrenaline coursing through his veins as he spat ignorant words down at him.

Essentially, degrading the android.

“When a human gives you an order, you obey. Got it? Stay outta my way... Next time, you won't get off so easy.” He winces from the memory of the words in his mind, thinking about how much regret he had associated with saying that.

And to top it off? He brushed his fingers right against Connor’s LED, signaling how he was inferior to humans. 

At the time, it had been true.

Looking back, he should’ve treated Connor nicer.

Gavin truly believed that androids were inferior to humans, that they were just advanced pieces of plastic going on to replace people in their jobs.

He was ignorant, he hadn’t been aware of the true extent that androids were feeling.

He remembers nearly killing Connor as he pulled out his pistol once again, suspicious as the android has scurried off to the archive room after him and Hank had been taken off the case.

It didn’t sit right with him.  
But to threaten an android like that?

He must have been stupid.

The androids were alive, whether their blood was a different color and their flesh was mainly composed of plastic and metal.

He realized that soon after the revolution had ended with Markus’s grand speech, watching Connor right behind him on the podium. He noticed how it seemed that Connor was internally struggling while he was up there, the drawing of a gun before putting it back.

Gavin’s not sure about what exactly caused Connor to become deviant, but he knows that his hostile behavior towards him had definitely sparked something within the android.

When did Gavin realize he had begun falling for Connor?

It wasn’t long after the revolution when he had seen Connor act more casually amongst his co-workers, a welcome party had been organized for him by the entire department as they made him feel welcomed in.

The first plastic detective.

He remembers awkwardly apologizing about his unacceptable behavior towards Connor who only gave him a short reply in return, saying that it was alright.

It wasn’t, was it?

It wasn’t fair for Gavin to treat Connor as if he was inferior, that he was less because he was different than humans.

He highly doubts that Connor had truly forgiven him.

His feelings quickly began blossoming as he watched Connor adjust to his surroundings, working with the team and smiling at every co-worker.

_Except him._

Connor had regarded Gavin with a cold gaze which was quite fair for how the detective had treated him.

It still didn’t feel right.  
He didn’t like that Connor was still upset with him when he apologized but he understands that it’ll take time.

Everything does.  
So, Gavin kept his distance, watching as Connor had felt a variety of emotions.

He watches as Connor fell in love with Hank, the man who had guided him towards deviating is what Connor tells people when they ask what mainly caused his deviancy.

It was all possible because Hank had been his partner.

His _precious_ Lieutenant.

Gavin had been jealous, quite jealous that Hank had managed to get someone so understanding, kind and handsome as Connor.

Truly a miracle.  
But there were obvious cracks in Connor and Hank’s relationship as time passed, he could tell that there were issues between them.

And the issues grew bigger and bigger as they were left unsolved.

He remembers the days where Connor being unable to look Hank in the eye, the times where they were unable to utter a word to each other without a fight ensuing.

Gavin recalls how absolutely heartbroken and devastated Connor had been after they had decided to end things.

It was pain that had been clearly written all over his face, from his very first heartbreak.

Gavin wasn’t close with him then and he couldn’t have offered any words of comfort.

But the detective could tell that he needed someone and that it shouldn’t be him who comforts Connor.

So he asks Tina, he practically begs her to talk with Connor.

She obliges.

She does her best, and Connor does open up about the heartbreak he’s experiencing, how he should have anticipated it when they first began dating. It was still unexpected and he was taken by surprise when Hank had suggested ending things due to the issues that they were facing.

They tried, from what Tina had told him.

But the issues grew bigger and bigger becoming unsolvable and they both agreed it was the best course of action as much as they both hated the outcome.

He’s never seen Connor like this, so human-like and heartbroken. The way his voice had cracked, as he began talking with Tina on they made their way towards the break room. He recalls that Hank hadn’t appeared at the station that day, probably called in sick so he could avoid the tension between him and Connor.

Gavin remembers how Connor had slowly started getting better, more focused on his work and how he and the Lieutenant began amending things, it was a slow but gradual process when they decided to start working together once again.

It was vastly different from before but perhaps for the best.

* * *

Connor’s second Christmas at the department, he had quite the charming company wrapped around his arm during the banquet.

Markus, the detective had seen him before. Once or twice when he had dropped off at the department, only a few times to speak with Connor about important matters related to the revolution.

Gavin didn’t realize there was something more hidden under their professional relationship.

He’s seen him on the news, the leader of the deviants. Gavin’s aware of the significant impact he’s had on Connor and the rest of the androids as he lead the freedom march, fighting for androids’ rights.

Markus was fairly attractive to the human eye, he was modeled after an interracial male and originally had soft green eyes, Gavin remembers watching an interview a few weeks after the revolution about the deviant leader’s different eye colors.

His left eye had been replaced with a compatible eye component during his trip to the android scrapyard, Markus had also managed to replace his broken parts there as well which is quite impressive in his busted condition.

Truly a wonderful man right by his side.

They must be dating, Gavin thought. And turns out his assumption wasn’t wrong at all.

The dazzling pair shared a small passionate kiss in their designer suits and the detective tries to contain his composure as he watched the lovebirds with each other.

It’s been quite a while since he’s seen Connor this happy and peaceful without Hank. It’s relieving but also heartwrenching that he isn’t the one causing Connor to smile, making him happy.

He _wishes_ he was.

He would absolutely love to be the one holding Connor closely, sharing tender sweet moments here and there, causing the android to smile goofily at him.

But that’s only a wish, and wishes don’t often come true.

So, he remains watching from the distance.

He watches as man after man, takes their shot at Connor and watches as the breakups occur, one after another.

It seems like Connor has bad luck associated with love.

He wasn’t sure what had happened with Markus, as he assumed the pair had been doing rather well until Connor had showed up at the precinct, one late night after he had clocked out earlier that night.

Gavin had stayed late at the station due to the immense amount of paperwork he had missed out on the day prior.

He watches as Connor storms in, grabbing his belongings from his desk as the detective had just returned from the bathroom.

“Connor?” His tone was soft, not too loud as whispered his name.

Connor freezes, clearly troubled as his led flickers to a distressed red. Gavin takes a few steps closer, trying to have a gentle approach towards his delicate state.

“You okay?” He asks, the question lingers in the air and Connor turns away, not bothering to answer Gavin’s question as the detective took a step closer towards him.

“What happened, you alright?” Gavin can clearly see the pain written on his face, and he doesn’t like seeing that.

He doesn’t like seeing Connor’s hurt expression.

Connor purses his lips, dropping the items back onto his desk in a scattered array.

“Just fucking peachy. What’s it to you?” He eyes Gavin with caution and the detective nearly winces from the coldness present in the android’s tone.

“You just seem upset, was wondering what’s going on with you,” Gavin spoke in a soft tone, trying his best not to worsen Connor’s mood as of now.

“I don’t need you to antagonize me, Detective Reed. It’s rather none of your business.” Connor hisses at Gavin who only keeps his distance from the irritated android.

“I know, I just... look, I’m sorry. I can’t change the shitty things I’ve done in the past, and I know that you’re obviously going through something right now. You don’t have to open up and spill everything but please don’t keep it bottled in. I’m here.” he speaks, trying his best to not further anger Connor.

A silence fills the air before Connor breaks it, snapping aggressively at Gavin.

“You’ve done nothing but humiliate me and ridicule me for being a machine! I’m not obligated to tell you anything. Actions speak much louder than words, detective.” He makes his message clear and Gavin can feel his heart twinging in pain.

  
_I’m sorry for everything_, he wishes he could say.

The only thing he manages to utter before Connor leaves the station was a, “You’re right.”

There are so many things left unsaid that night, but news makes its’ way around the station during the following week and he learns what had occurred the other night.

Connor and his boyfriend had broken up, due to a huge disagreement about how Markus had always been more work-oriented throughout their entire relationship.

Gavin understands where both sides are coming from, he’s been on both sides, known how it felt to be there.

Awful.

And he can’t exactly blame Markus for ending things with Connor when he’s extremely busy as he holds the title of the deviant leader. He’s fighting for more rights for androids, and that itself is an admirable deed.

It’s been nearly two years since the revolution and surprisingly, Gavin hasn’t died within his line of duty as of yet. The distance between him and Connor grows bigger once again after the detective had caught Connor in immense distress after his latest breakup.

There were times where he wishes that he could simply reset their very first interactions and move on to build a positive relationship, void of all the malice he had inflicted onto Connor.

He can’t. And that’s the thing that fucks him up daily, knowing that he could have acted much nicer towards Connor, knowing that there had been a small possibility of them not going down this road.

He’s messed up, and he’s unable to make up for the humiliation and pain he’s caused Connor.

There had been some nights after the revolution where the detective had cried, realizing how much he genuinely cared for Connor and how badly he had messed things up. There was only a slim possibility of sincere forgiveness.

He doesn’t try again, he doesn’t even bother throwing a glance Connor’s way when he sees him.

He gives up on the idea that they could have been something.

Because Gavin knows it won’t happen.

It could _never_ happen.

* * *

Months go by, and Gavin’s feelings for Connor don’t grow any weaker but he doesn’t act on them.

Something out of the blue happens, Connor entering the station with a notorious man following right behind him, known as Captain Allen.

He remembers the few cases he had to work on with that prick, the captain had always been rather demanding and not understanding of his team’s limits. Gavin sees Captain Allen as someone who is work-oriented, ambitious and quite possessive. His gaze travels down to the pair’s hands, which are delicately intertwined with each other.

_Together?_  
They must be _together_.  
His heart _sinks_.

The fleeting thought crosses his mind and he’s frustrated, watching time and time again as Connor has gotten hurt by the previous men.

Connor giggles as the grip tightens around his hand and the detective quietly observed David Allen smiling with his company.

Gavin feels his heart twinging in pain as he grits his teeth, reminding himself that it’s “okay” as long as they’re happy together, because Connor’s happiness has always been one of his top priorities whether it’s caused by him or not.

He tore his gaze away from the couple, doing his best to keep his composure and letting out a sigh.

Gavin absolutely hates this but he’s too much of a coward to show how he truly feels toward Connor.

There are days when he gets drunk off his ass to forget about his affection towards Connor.

Other days when he can’t be bothered to leave his apartment for work, because he’d rather not face Connor.

Maybe he could request a transfer to another station.

But that would mean losing Tina, his best friend.

It wasn’t worth it.  
Gavin would continue on, with his one-sided love towards Connor for god knows how long.

* * *

Several months have gone by since then and Gavin had noticed marks, concerning hurtful bruises scattered amongst Connor’s body.

He doesn’t question it, but he observes from a distance.

_Like he always has._

Connor seems to not be as happy as he once was, the damage quite apparent on his skin and Gavin is hoping that David isn’t doing this to him.

Because Connor _deserves_ better.

Gavin observes as Connor makes his way towards Hank, talking about their recent case and shrugging off the Lieutenant’s questions about the bruises and marks on his body.

The detective is concerned about Connor’s relationship but he doesn’t comment about it.

There were always risks associated with being a detective and this was definitely one of those times in the most recent case.

He had been partnered up with Chris, Hank and Connor had also been assigned to investigate the area.

He remembers chasing after the perpetrator, the gun pulled out and the shot had been directed towards Connor.

His body moved fast, shielding Connor who let out a surprised gasp, as Gavin slumped down from the shot. The perpetrator had ran off, clearly terrified after shooting a human officer.

The shot had punctured his shoulder and the pain began searing in Gavin’s shoulder, the bullet tearing through the fleshy area and he heaves heavily as he nearly collapses on the ground with Connor besides him.

“D-D-Detective Reed,” Connor sounded absolutely devastated, he could hear the evident fear in the android’s voice.

It’s nice, having Connor here with him.

The pain stings and he’s losing a concerning amount of blood as he lays there and listens to Connor sobbing as he applies a tourniquet to the bullet wound.

“Y-Y-You didn’t have to do that, you’re f-fragile. You could die, Gavin.” It’s the first time hearing his name spilling from Connor’s lips and the detective decides that he likes it, even as the pain burns.

He’s fainting in and out of consciousness, and he managed to mutter under his breath with a small pained smile.

“I-It would be _w-w-worth_ it for _y-you_.” His vision goes black.

* * *

Two days after the incident, he had woken up in the hospital with Connor right by his side.

Gavin’s eyes fluttered open, examining his surroundings and noticing that he was connected to the IV tubes, and his body was quite sore.

He glances over to Connor who appears to be in stasis, lounging across the sofa.

“Connor.” the detective weakly whispers, tapping on his hospital bed which seemed to have alerted the android.

“You’re awake.” Connor acknowledges and he manages to slowly nod through his pounding headache.

He notices that his whole shoulder is bandaged up and he decides to ask about what had happened after the incident.

“I passed out, didn’t I? Did the ambulance arrive?” Gavin asks to which Connor nods before delving into detail about what had occurred after.

“They had to perform surgery on your shoulder to remove the bullet and bandaged you up as soon as you got to the hospital,” Connor explains, through the dimly-lit hospital room.

“I see.” Gavin manages to say before the android continues.

“I think we should talk,” Connor begins and notices the clear tension in the other male’s face before clarifying what he had meant.

“I’ve thought about what you’ve said before you passed out.” Connor states and Gavin feels an uneasy feeling settled into the pit of his stomach, he shifts his gaze away from the android.

Connor plays with his coin, fumbling around with it as he gets right to the point.

“Why? Why did you shield me if you knew you could lose your life?” Connor’s questions lingers in the air and silence falls between as Gavin ponders an acceptable excuse for his behavior without revealing his true feelings towards Connor.

Gavin gulps, before speaking in a soft tone.

“Look, it was just heat of the moment. Was _afraid_ you’d get hurt.” Gavin manages to say, his eyes darting onto Connor’s for a small moment.

“Alright.” Connor takes that, not bothering to press any further of interrogate him.

* * *

A few days later and Gavin had been discharged from the hospital, it would take a few weeks to recover so he had been assigned to paid leave for the rest of the week and then paperwork the following week he got back.

Sharp pain throughout this shoulder whenever he had touched the area to adjust the bandages on there.

Even when he moved, it was sore and painful.

He rests for the remainder of the week and manages to return to the station, the following week.

His eyes are greeted by the sight of Connor’s bruised face and the dejected look upon it.

It’s agonizing to see someone he loves suffering like that. But it’s not his place to advise Connor on what to do, so he stays quiet as he slowly makes his way over to his desk, taking a seat down.

He overhears Hank’s conversation with Connor.

“Connor, I’m worried about you.” The older man spoke up, placing the tablet on the desk as he glanced over at the android, maintaining eye contact.

“I’m fine, Hank. Allen is a little rough sometimes, that’s all.” Connor shifts his gaze around the department, trying to avoid Hank’s eyes.

“There’s a difference between rough and abusive, Connor.” The Lieutenant says sternly, watching the android’s facial expressions.

“I know, and he hasn’t done anything to threaten my wellbeing, Hank. He loves me as much as I love him.” Connor manages to say, his eyes meeting with Hank’s.

“If that’s what you believe.” he responds skeptically before lowering his voice, “listen, I’m here for you.”

Connor nods while shifting his gaze back to the computer screen, glancing at the most recent cases.

Gavin feels something wrenching in his gut as he watches the interaction between them.

He wants Connor to be safe, but it isn’t his place to comment nor get involved in their relationship.

There’s a time period where Connor hadn’t showed up to the station in a few weeks and the officers began to get antsy without their favorite android around, Gavin did as well. He was concerned, why would Connor be out of work for this long time?

He’s _worried_, wondering about what must have happened to Connor.

* * *

A week had passed and a familiar android sauntered into the station, seems to be not in the greatest condition.

There were evident marks of parts being replaced as he maneuvered towards his desk, and small scars that decorated his jaw, his eyes were teary.

It’s different.  
He didn’t expect Connor to walk in after his long absence, looking like this as if he’s been repeatedly harmed and on the verge of tears.

Chris approaches Connor, whispering in a soft tone.

“You alright, Connor? How are you and David doing?”

The android stays silent for a moment before meeting the officer’s eyes and quietly mumbling under his breath, as he fiddled with his hands.

“I’ve... had to undergo some immense repairs in the past month. I’m functioning and... David and I have broken things off.” Connor voice wavers as he speaks, clearly discomforted by the conversation at hand.

“I see, sorry for intruding.” Chris quickly apologizes before dashing off and Gavin observed as Connor works quietly.

It sucks.  
Pretty terrible knowing that Gavin had watched time and time again, Connor being repeatedly hurt by men he had chosen to pursue relationships with.

He wants Connor to be happy but by the looks of it right now... he’s far from it.

This is a love he’s carried for a few years, and he’s exhausted as he sits in the distance, observing Connor’s behaviors and failed relationships.

He’s _tired_ of not trying.  
Gavin’s _tired_ of watching from afar.

So, he decides.  
He decides to finally try and do what he can for Connor, getting closer to the android even if it didn’t turn out how he wanted.

It starts with small conversations, and slight smiles directed towards Connor.

Then there’s the night on the rooftop of the police department, Connor had approached Gavin as he was taking a smoke break.

He remembers that night so vividly.

“Gavin.” The android had approached him, and Gavin pops the cigarette from his mouth, exhaling the smoke before answering Connor.

“What’s up?” He turns to face Connor who seems to be nervous about what he’s about to say, the detective instinctively leaned over to observe his LED color before realizing it had been taken off quite recently.

“Could I come over to your place after work? I’d like to meet your cats, they seem so cute from the pictures you’ve shown me,” he asks, waiting for Gavin’s response who only grins.

“Of course you can, dipshit.” The detective feels overjoyed at the thought of Connor visiting his stupid but adorable cats, Milo and Socks.

The visit lasted around two hours, with Connor playing with interactive cat toys for a majority of the time and cuddling the cats as well, earning their affection.

It was relieving to see Connor in such a happy state, to see him so happy from Gavin’s cats.

He loves Connor, but he’ll never admit it.

Until he does.

He hadn’t expected Connor to express his romantic feelings towards Gavin, and how it wouldn’t impact them severely if the detective didn’t feel the same.

“Gavin... after some thought. I realized that I like you, more than a friend should. I mean, romantically,” Connor’s quite direct, as he spoke about his feelings.

“It won’t change after if you don’t feel the same way, it’s just how I feel and I wanted you to know——“ Connor quickly said, before the detective had cut him off, diving straight forward as he pressed his lips right against his, causing the android to still in surprise before kissing Gavin back.

“I _love_ you.” The words were tender, sweet as they spill from Gavin’s lips and Connor seems stunned by sudden declaration of love before murmuring under his breath in acceptance.

“I... I think... I might... love you too.” Connor’s unsure and with time, they’ll see where this goes and if it’ll work out.

* * *

It starts with small dates, gradually cuddling with each other and small affectionate gestures towards each other at work. They decided to keep it a secret, however it wouldn’t be surprising if the whole station knew from how friendly they were nowadays.

He remembers having Connor for the first time, kissing him tenderly and reassuring him that they can stop if he wants.

They worked through their issues together, understanding each other’s point of view and apologizing if they had done anything wrong.

It was _perfect_, Gavin had been so happy.

But like every relationship Connor has, this must have been the one with the worst ending.

Gavin’s always known that pursuing a career involving criminals was going to be the death of him, which... in this case, it was.

_He doesn’t want to die._

He can hear Connor’s panicked voice upon discovering his nearly dead body as he drifts in and out of consciousness from the rapid blood loss, quickly pooling around his body, crimson spreading throughout the wood floor.

He can no longer hear Connor’s words as he’s on the verge of passing out.

The detective only notices the pained tears trickling down Connor’s cheeks and he wishes, he wishes he could tell Connor that he was going to be okay and that he was a fighter, that he’ll make it through this.

_He won’t._  
_It wasn’t going to be okay._

“I _love_ you, Connor.” He manages to say, before giving in to the sleep that was lulling him, his eyelids fluttering shut.

In his last moments, Gavin had looked back on the time when he had antagonized Connor, watching from a distance as time and time again, the android had gotten hurt from people he loved. The time he had taken a bullet for him, remembering that moment when they had gotten together.

The detective wishes they had _more_ time.

Connor sobs, well-aware of the fact that he had arrived too late.

He analyzes Gavin Reed, his heart sinking as his analysis pops up.

**_Gavin Reed (deceased)_**  
_Date of Birth: 10/7/02_  
_ Date of Death: 3/21/44_  
_ Height: 5’9 | Weight 176 lbs_  
_ Estimated time of death: 7:28 pm_

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know about you but I had the sudden idea to kill Gavin off halfway through writing this and I hate that I implemented the idea in this story because for me, I felt that both deserved a happy ending with one another. On the other hand, another part of me was also like: fuck the readers' emotions over and kill off Gavin for a not-so-happy ending because it's so heavily common to give the readers a happy ending. 
> 
> There's nothing wrong with a happy ending, just that it hasn't been a thing for me to conclude with, in my previous deleted works.  
I hope you enjoyed this emotional rollercoaster and comments and kudos are greatly appreciated <3
> 
> edit: forgot to mention I plan to write 3 companion pieces describing what exactly went wrong in Connor’s relationships! stay tuned for that :)


End file.
